What was Missing
by CrsysTalMaiden
Summary: What if a Yato, who's clan is well known for it's Top Notch fighting abilities got her favorite snack stolen? . . . Heck, all hell break loose OkiKagu pairing Rated T for as usual, Kagura's potty mouth
1. Chapter 1

_Helloooooo~~ Minna-san! ^_^ This is my first time writing an OkiKagu fic :3 makes me really nervousss~~ I'm very sorry if this is OOC and if you don't like the writing style -_- REALLY, just don't continue reading if you feel something odd – ahahhahh XD for those who have enough courage to read my fic then ~~ WELCOME ABOARD! Sorry in advance for the grammatical error and spellings ^_^_

- If I do own Gintama, I would change its Genre into romance and put OkiKagu in every chapter/ episode… But nobody wants that, I think? Coz' it won't be Gintama anymore XD -

Banana 1, Banana 2, Banana 3, Banana 4, Go Kondo Go!

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Chapter 1: **Asking someone is such a pain in the ass especially if a jerk is with you**

" NANI?!"

Was what everyone in the Kabukichou district heard first thing in the morning

" So ya' mean all of my heavenly sukonbu got stolen, yes?" said the vermillion haired girl clad in Red Chinese clothing as she grabbed the old lady's shirt. Cerulean orbs were glaring straight into the poor lady's eyes screaming the word 'kill' if somebody would not answer the agitated girl's question.

"It's not like it's my fault, ne, missy?"

*yakuza like* "Huh?!" now pointing her purple parasol at the lady with every intention to mince her the next time she won't answer properly.

" Looks like I have to arrest you for threatening innocent civilian you Chinese Monster" deadpanned a sandy brown haired guy in his late teens with bored expression and empty crimson red eyes.

"Shut—!"

Kagura had no time to retort back when her rival fired his bazooka which was approaching her in a fast speed. She had no problem escaping his surprise attack as she was, a Yato. She grabbed the old lady's clothes and somersaulted away from the soon-to-be mashed counter.

Boom!

" Oi! Did the sadist in you ate your brain already huh?! Were you trying to kill us?! And I am not a Chinese Monster you jerk!"

" Tch." Was Sougo's reply as he clicked his tongue in a disappointed manner

"So you really were! Pack your things up and go to hell, sadist!" exclaimed Kagura as she prepared to engage in a battle with her rival. In a matter of seconds, she was already above the sadist, ready to kick the living daylights out of him.

"Ladies first, China" copying the speed of light, Sougo unsheathed his katana and blocked the Yato's attack.

Punches, kicks and curses followed afterwards as the two rivals continued to fight on their own little world. Until a shaky voice interrupted their fight

"Ano—if you could fight somewhere else I -!"

But she was not given enough time to finish her sentence. In a blink of an eye, the two rivals pointed their weapons at the now pale faced vendor, paler than a Yato's skin and who's face was currently screaming a "help me" look.

" Oi! Author-san! Help me! Or I'll be minced meat in a matter of seconds! Im just a minor character! Spare my minor life so that I can still work in my minor store to fulfill my minor dream, to find a minor beach where I can spend my minor vacation time away from this fic!" whispered the old woman as she faced the ceiling as if talking to somebody

" **Sorry baa- san… don't worry nobody's gonna' interrupt with your minor life :3 "**

"NO! Don't leave me alone!" as she dramatically shouted which was then followed by echoes she intended to create to sound dramatic

" You already reached your limits and your brain melted away , yes? " interrupted Kagura as she was already pissed at the minor character doing dramatic echoes.

" Going back to our 'friendly' conversation earlier , before a certain someone fired his oh-so reliable bazooka at us," sarcasm was hinted on the young girl's voice

" Ouch, you hurt this handsome policeman's feeling, China. I'll have to arrest you for that"

"Go rot away somewhere sadist" she responded back " As I was saying, where is my sukonbu, you hag?!"

" Ah, all of the Tobasco sauce is gone to , I needed that to kill Hijibaka today"

"Eh?! You too sadist?!"

"Oh no, not really China, I was saying that I found a lot of Tobasco sauce in this store even your face is shaped into one " as he rolled his eyes " You know, I should really reward you for being so dumb someday" a smirk then followed

Kagura, on the verge of losing her patience just ignored her rival's comment .

"_The importance of my sukonbu is way WAY better than arguing with this bastard. It was a very fine day, at last after months of spending my time with my oh- ever- so responsible employer and second dad, the man FINALLY gave me enough money to buy 5 packs of sukonbu and he gave it to me WILLINGLY , can you imagine that?! I thought that would only happen when Gin-chan's perm hair would be straight and Patsuan would stop fanboying Otsuu- chan, and when Mayora would rather eat Mustard then he won't be called Mayora but Mustara instead! Wow, Kami-sama must be fond of me!_

_But boy… for the love of Sukonbu, why do you have to get stolen now and why does this man have to show up?!"_

Kagura pondered as she was on her trail of thoughts. Recovering back, she threatened the old lady again.

" Tell me who stole my sukonbu or your dead, You don't want that, yes?"

" Count me in China, I cannot complete my mission today without Tobasco sauce"

And together, they pointed their weapon again to the old lady. As if being arrested, she instinctively raised her hands in the air

"T-the one who S-stole it was-"

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Ohhraaahhh! Thanks for keeping up with me though your already vomiting right now :3 I'm sorry if there were grammatical errors , wrong spelling and if OOC-ness covered the whole fic .

This very lonely author would appreciate it if someone kind-hearted enough would leave a review ^_^ feel free to criticize me or correct anything~~ you might discover that this author is an M ;)

**This would be updated sooner if I would get a review ne~~ I am such a petty author *3***


	2. Chapter 2

_Yay~~ Im done with chapter 2 ~ wew … Thank you for the reviews and follows! REALLY sorry it took me days to update -_- I really ran out of ideas~~ anyway, A VERY BIG HUG to __**KIMI MIYAMOTO EMERI **__( I'll remember those ^_^) __**C.A.M.E.O. 1 and Only **__... __**IloveAllAnime16… Okita Kagura… Sunny- Baby- Angel…**_

_I'm sorry if this chapter is such a disappointment -_- I really ran out of ideas so I squeezed all of the remaining sparks in my brain :3 _

_Well~~ here goes nothing_

-If I did own Gintama, I could have changed Hijikata's addiction from mayonnaise to mustard :3 –

Mayo 1, Maro 2, Mayo 3… GO MAYORA!

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Chapter 2 : **Failing to kill your superior in a day is better than proving your innocence at a certain someone especially if she has reached the maximum level of stupidness**

"T-The one who s-stole it was a man clad in black!"

" A man, yes?"

Nodding, the lady continued her sentence.

" It was when I was opening my store when I noticed that there was a man inside, all dressed in black and he was putting all of the sukonbu and tobasco sauce in a very big bag! This big!" extending her arms to portray how big the bag was.

" He is about your age young man! And he has the same hair color as you! Wait, maybe-" In an abrupt manner, her consciousness was sent to a different dimension as the shelf above collapsed on her head. Miniature versions of the shelf danced around hear head and a drool welcomed itself down her moth.

A streak of lightning greeted the district while cumulonimbus clouds formed above Kagura's head. Perfectly cut vermillion bangs covered the girl's bright cerulean eyes.

Sougo could not decipher what his rival was mumbling. Until her face shot up and the usual cerulean orbs morphed into dark blue ones. Numerous angry marks covered her temple.

"Oh shit, the apocalypse is here"

Putting his sadistic attitude aside, he ran towards the street in order to at least save the already destroyed store from being turned to ashes by a certain pissed off yato girl.

" Go pack your boxers and bid your farewell to this world sadist!" she sprung from the ground and positioned her umbrella to fire bullets at a certain sadist.

" Hey, do not go accusing on your own, China" evading the bullets without much energy, he continued his sentence

" Besides, who would want to steal something as disgusting as that?"

" Wadda'ya say?!"

" I said it's D-I-S-G-U-S-T-I-N-G" emphasizing the last word letter by letter

The red head was about to launch a combo at her rival but was stopped mid-way by someone

"Kagura-chan!"

A glasses wearing a boy stepped out from the crowd that has unknowingly gathered around kagura and sougo who were placing bets on which side would win. Though, sighs of disappointments were heared as the attack was stopped by a certain glasses.

"**Author-san! The one wearing the glasses is me! Not the other way around!"**

"**Aye? But I think I did it right"**

"Arghh!" the man just shouted in utter defeat and anger

"Wanna be the next one to meet your grandmother in the afterlife next to the sadist, yes?"

" Of course not! What are you doing Kagura-chan?! I happen to notice that there was a huge crowd gathering here. I decided to take a look but and saw you almost killing Okita-san!" Shinpachi performing the role of a straight man, interrogated his co- worker.

" I should have killed him if you haven't butted in , Patsuan"

"Oi! Who're you calling Patsuan?!"

"Oh please China, we all know a brat like you can't beat me"

"Why You-!"

"Stop wrecking havoc everywhere you two fight, will you?"

Knowing the owner of the voice too well, Kagura turned around with a big grin plastered on her face only to be welcomed by a man in his early 30's with dead fish eyes and pinky stuck deep on his ear, looking uninterested as ever.

"Gin-chan!"

His employee ran towards him with massive tears flowing from her eyes and snot running down from her nose. Rainbow colored flowers served as her background, an act which is often used by a certain gorilla.

"Gin-chan! Health me! Health me!"

"It's help me, idiot. H-E-L-P me" spanking Kagura on the head on the process

"Aitai Gin-chan! Ah! That bastard over there stole all of my sukonbu!"

"Ah, Souchirou-kun"

"Danna, Sougo desu"

"Whatever…Is it true, soy sauce-kun?"

" Oi! That's way too far from his name Gin – san!" the straight man corrected his employer though nobody paid attention to his ramblings, as usual.

"Why would I want to steal a crap like that?"

"Because you got jealous at me, uh huh! Seeing me eat my sukonbu made your mouth wanting to try some too!"

"Then, why would I also steal all of the tobasco sauce? Use your brains sometimes China before worms starts invading eat. Oh wait, you don't even have brains anymore, it decayed a long time ago" Red orbs glinted and his trademark smirk appeared on his stoic face.

"I've had enough of this patience bull!" finally reaching her limits, the infuriated Yato leaped from the ground and in an instant was behind her rival. She stooped down and extended her legs to kick the sadist or more likely, to break his legs. But unfortunately for her, the sadist jumped high enough so he escaped another * leg injury.

"Heh, so you were trying to be patient? I did not notice it at all"

"Yeah I was! For the sake of setting my mind on finding my sukonbu! But now that's just crap"

Kagura fired her parasol/gun her rival at an unbelievable speed pointing it at every direction the sadist would jump at.

"You are really trying to kill me huh? China?"

"Self defense is not murder, Sadist, Tch—why won't you just stay still so I can send you to the afterlife early"

"Is that even called self defense?"

"ENOUGH! Did the two of you forget that we are still here ?!" the straight man was now shouting

In unison the two rivals replied "URUSAI-!"

They were cut of when a perm bumped their head together

BAM!

"Aww! Gin-chan!"

"Aitai, danna"

"Why won't you listen to this poor lady, maybe she knows some clue instead of solving the problem by trying to kill each other" the silver haired man sighed

"U-um actually this bishounen here did not steal it, yes, he has the same hair and maybe age as the criminal but the man in black has emerald ones"

"I told you, China"

Ignoring her rival, she let out a girlish scream

"Kyaahh! Maybe he's a member of the men in black! Maybe I could meet Agent J! Gin-chan prepare the autograph notebook!" Kagura shouted with pure excitement

For the third time, Gin spanked her head.

"Missy, I already told you that he's a man clad in black at the starting of the chapter didn't I? Anyways, he looks like this"

The woman handed Kagura a paper which has the man's face on it, or so she thought.

" Is his face a crap?" Kagura mused as she continued to inspect the paper

"Kagura -chan, don't go calling someone's face crap" Shinpachi reprimanded the younger girl

" He's right Kagura, instead call them UUO"

"What's that Gin-chan?"

"It's an acronym for an Unidentified Ugly Object"

"Oh~ so is his face a UUO then?"

"Hey! That's my drawing! Don't go calling other's masterpiece a crap or a UUO!" the woman shouted as she took her 'masterpiece' from kagura's hand.

"Just as I thought no one would appreciate my art, well be thankful my CCTV camera captured his photo, here"

Sougo came closer to the yoruzuya idiots in order to know who the culprit was.

"Oh well he's in the care of you two now" Gin waved his hands as he got father and farther away with Shinpachi on his side.

"You mean 'Kick his ass' right Gin-chan?!" shouted Kagura at the now disappearing silhouette of the two men.

"So , China, what do we do now?" Sougo was beside her now, staring at the street were the two Yoruzuya members disappeared to.

" Well for now it's a truce then"

Smirking, the two spoke in unison

"The man hunt is on"

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WEW! That was long :3 I had no time proofreading :3 I am very sorry if there are grammatical errors and misspellings

Well, criticisms are always welcomed~~ remember that the review button is not an enemy ^_^

Ja'ne


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